A Rose By Any Other Name ...

So I may have a few new readers as I have been blog-pimping (ugh, hate the term - is blog-whoring any more feministe?) a bisl of late. The question of my nom de plume has arisen so here's a reminder from my very first post:

Why "Doctor"?

I was so goddamn SICK of being asked if I was a "Miss" or "Mrs." ... or even a "Ms."!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S 2009, PEOPLE!!!!! The title "Ms." came into being in order to REPLACE the Miss/Mrs binary, not to signify a third category of angry female because why the hell do over half the world's population have to identify their frigging marital status in their name? (Because we have vaginas?) So to avoid the whole mishegas, I got a Ph. D.

Why "Plog"?

Well, "Blog = Web + Log". As a Luddite all my thoughts originate with the Mighty Pen. Ergo, "Paper + Log = Plog". (And I'm normally so bad at maths!) Also "Plog" sounds like "Plod" which conjures up images of flat-footed, bumbling policemen (and although Law Enforcement is not my schtick, I am both flat-footed and bumbling).

So there y'have it, kinderlach. Although I have been thinking about coming out behind the cloak of anonymity lately. I mean I know the six of you who occasionally dip into this bog (NOT a typo) socially, and it's not like I've got some high-falutin' career to protect.

What do you think?

Beer-y Funny

One thing I will miss about N19 is the feeling of being framed by a gaggle of glorious gastro-pubs. Also: I love when the opportunity for a funny is observed and fulfilled - why not be amusing or wry or clever? Why not elicit smiles or chuckles or guffaws? (I love a good guffaw!) Suffice to say, I am a big fan of the microbrewery at the always excellent Junction Tavern.

Shame I can't stand the taste of beer. I am a shitty excuse for an Oy-strine.

"If You've Googled Yourself ...

CLAP YOUR HANDS!

If You've Googled Yourself ...

CLAP YOUR HANDS!"

So I googled myself. And if you enter my name ("Oh Matron!), you get almost two pages, excepting the very last one on page 2, at this minute: London time 01:03, that actually refer to me. Me! The real person behind a Google conjunction! Which is rare in the context of googling(?) gulaging(?) the peeps you meet, only to bring up a scrollsworth of eighteenth century architects and other antiquated irrelevancies (the firstnames and surnames MILES apart ... in overencumbered PDFs related to Annual General Meeting Notes of Junior(sic) High Softball Teams in Bumfuck, USA ...)

But I digress.

It's not my actual birth certificate name - haven't checked that yet - but the diminutive of my given aka in Oz Christian name - which is actually the name my mum wanted to give me but was urged it was too cutesy and childish and I might want to adopt the longer form as an adult (oops). When she was pregnant with me, Mama Plog worked at a creche, where she was completely bewitched by an adorable toddler, (insert Dr. P's everyday name) + Brown (it's alliterative, folks!) here.

It's only now, 2010, that I was lured by some naive facebook commenter two-friends-removed to check out my name on urbandictionary.com ...

I dare you to do that and record your findings here!

And not only because my name is apparently slang for "blow job" ...

Le sigh.

So back to self-googling. I urge you all -- google yourselves. And then please post your results, or at least your reactions to the aforementioned results in the comment section below.

"Cher Is On The Airwaves Talking To The DJ"

To Larry King, actually. About Michael's sweetness as a young man.

About Bob Mackie and beaded socks and Val Kilmer and stuff.

So surreal.

And I'm a tad inder the unfluence. And thinking about Chas, the daughter formerly known as Chastity. Who calls a child Chastity? The least sexy of all of the virtues, majorly trumped by Faith, see Paloma.

I'm a bit names-obsessed. The mister chastises me about it daily.

Cheers!

The "Little Jew"

I came across this footnote in a book I am reviewing:

"According to Ann Pellegrini, the slang for clitoris in Vienna in the 1890s was the "little Jew," and female masturbation was commonly referred to as "playing with the Jew." Pellegrini, Performance Anxieties, 29.

Apologies to Bob Balaban (above), a brilliant actor (Seinfeld) but he was the first person to spring to mind as physically embodying said little Jew (not that he looks like mine one bit!).

BB was followed swiftly into my brain by Ron Rifkin but that's probably only because Brothers and Sisters has been playing on a loop at Casa del Plog. Mr P lasts longer in those marathons than I do (TV tantra?) because the combination of Walker melodrama and my crying quickly wears me out. It's one of the shows we really love watching together, though (others include Damages, Life On Mars, The Daily Show, ... Jonathon Ross) as opposed to those we can't watch together (his: 24, Doctor Who, documentaries about gross physical/ deeply depressing things; and mine: Law and Order, Law and Order SVU, Law and Order Criminal Intent, Monk, Psych, et al).

I so love TV. I was reared by it and I continue to nuzzle on its sweet narrative-driven nectar. mmmmmmMMMMNNNNnnnnnnn TV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Time to play with my little Jew ...

(Kidding!)

Having A Wale[s] Of A Time

Sorry for the prolonged absence, kiddies. I was away in Wales with my mother. We lived like royalty (more on that later) and couldn't pronounce a single word.

Hope you're living it up wherever you are. Looking forward to getting back into a routine.

Lots of love,

Dr P xxx

I-Writeus

I have just been diagnosed with iritis (after three wrong diagnoses of conjunctivitus and three useless series of antibiotics - more like iwrongus, so be vigilant about checking, eye-infected people). One of my favourite people M said it sounded like an illness a writer would get:

IWRITEUS

And I am more comfortable with the prognosis spelt that way! Just like I prefer thinking in terms of my "feyonce" (rhymes with Beyonce.) Aaahhh, words! And spelling! Two of my Favourite Things!

Is how a word is spelt important to you? Does it affect how you think of the word? What about with names, for example? Is Catherine the same as Kathryn? Is Jeff the same as Geoff?